Weekend Writing Warriors Excerpt #14

Weekend Writing Warriors is an awesome blog hop that allows writers to share their published or unpublished work with the blogosphere. On Sundays, courageous writers share an 8-sentence excerpt to get feedback or to gain new readers. If you’re interested in joining or want to read fun, action-packed, charming, and/or drama filled pieces of fiction, please visit the WeWriWa’s website on Sunday, Sept. 21st.

Here’s the continuation of my chapter. Thanks everyone for your feedback and kind words of my story so far 🙂 Here goes:

“We should go,” Perry said.

Colin gave a devilish grin. “Or we can buy shots.” Before Perry could answer, Colin stood up and headed towards the side of the crowded room where Cody and his entourage were. He stood, scooting himself between Cody and a feisty redhead who was licking the salt off the rim of her  margarita glass.

Perry remained seated and scratched his head. He made eye contact with the bodyguards, shrugged, then went over to help his friend; Colin shouldn’t fight his battles.

Keep smiling,

Yawatta Hosby




14 thoughts on “Weekend Writing Warriors Excerpt #14

  1. Hi Yawatta. I agree with Joyce–that is a unique visual. Nicely done.

    One (small) thing that jumped out at me was the use of “stood” twice in quick succession. In the first: “Colin stood up and headed towards…” I think you can eliminate it. “Colin headed towards…” Then the second doesn’t feel redundant. 🙂

    Good dialogue and visuals. 🙂

  2. Pingback: Book Blogger Tag | Miss Alexandrina

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s