Should I stop? What’s the point? Last night, these thoughts kept running through my mind as I sat in front of my computer screen with the Word document opened (still untitled). I didn’t do anything for two hours straight while I watched The Voice. Then something told me I should keep going. That this is a 90 day challenge so get to work. I obeyed even if I hesitated a little.
I don’t know what it is, but for the past four days, I’ve lost motivation to continue with this novel. It’s like I’m adding scenes–just because. Because it has to be a novel so should be over 50,000. Because I have only a few more days left so should keep going. Because my inner-nerd doesn’t want to fail the challenge.
- I talked with my writing buddy this morning, and she’s been experiencing the same feeling. Maybe it’s the 90 day challenge blues. I wondered if it would creep along somewhere in the timeline. With NaNo, it appeared in week 2. Maybe for this challenge, it happens at the very end. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one going through this.
I have the middle and ending. I’m just working on the beginning now (I wrote out of order). Some days I wonder if this should just be a short story or novella. If that’s the case, then I should stop writing and focus on deleting the scenes that don’t really add anything to the plot. Scenes that are just there to add word count. However, maybe I should keep going to see if something interesting will happen at the beginning. Maybe I should start where the middle is–where the celebrity scandal has already taken place–instead of trying to plan things out beforehand.
All those thoughts are running through my mind at once. I’m going to pull my hair out. I love my story, I really do. It’s not boring to me at all; that’s why I’m so baffled that I keep debating over a short story or novel. This is the 90 day novel challenge I participated in, but it wouldn’t be the end of the world if I spent 90 days working on a shorter piece of fiction. At least, it’d be a finished first draft either way.
Since first drafts are meant for experimentation, I guess I’ll keep on writing. What’s the worst that could happen? I’m afraid to even answer that…